So today the mailgrump left me a letter... it was from the Scooter Store. Yes, The Scooter Store, as in America's #1 Power Chair and Scooter Provider. You have seen the commercials. You know the product. It wasn't addressed to "resident at Small Town, Alabama," ( dramatic pause inserted here) it was addressed to me. The letter was very understanding and assured me that if I have this type of chair, I will not grow dependent on it.. but I will GROW in my independence... well sure. To PROVE this point, they enclosed an assessment for me to take... and that got me thinking... It might be fun and educational to take it with you:
OK- pencil sharpened- let's begin
1.Do you sometimes feel left out by not being able to get together with family and friends? **I must tread lightly both said family and friends read this*** um... NO ( played it safe)
2.Do you have health related issues limit your mobility? No
3.Are you having trouble getting to your kitchen or dining facility by yourself for a meal? See- this is a tricky question..part of me wants to say "YES" so I can stop the cooking.. but this is serious business so I am going to go with NO
4.Is it difficult for you to get to the bathroom alone? OK... they read my last post... OBVIOUSLY
8. Skipped a few but I am losing interest- Have you fallen in the past few months? Yes , Yes I have...
Now it tells me if I have answered YES to any of the questions to call them and they will discuss my needs...um... ok- let me think this over, They are going to help me get out of deathtrap of a date, stop cooking, AND cure my clumsiness... I think I should call.... Thanks, Mailgrump... You are a dream weaver.
*** I do realize this product is needed and very helpful to those with health issues-Thankfully, I am blessed and do not need a scooter.*** I just find it absurd that they mail it out by name to a healthy person in their twenties ... WHAT? it's my story , I will tell it like I want too...