Saturday, November 20, 2010

It's A Gift

This is the time of year I like to pay special attention to teaching my children "the act of giving".  If you have a little, you should give a little.  If you have a lot, you should give a lot.  Simple rule of thumb.  This year,my crew will be giving a few toys to a local church for a family in our area. We are making gift bags for elderly shut-ins and sending personal items to Jimmy Hale/Jesse's place.  I have a large stockpile of toothpaste, deodorant, shampoo, lotions, anything a person could need really- that I never pay more than a few cents for after coupons... This is the time to put all that effort to good use.

NOW- do not get me wrong, I am NO saint and to prove that point allow me to share a conversation I had with myself a few days ago:

For this to be the hap-happiest time of the year...everyone sure is pushy or in a hurry.  Now, as a rule I have zero patience for tailgaters...they tick me off.  I get a mild case of road rage.  In hurry buddy? "Should have left a little earlier" is my line of thinking.
So I was toodlin' down the road (going the speed limit or like 2 OVER- ahuh.. I was flying) and I felt the presence of an unwanted visitor  (pause inserted here for dramatic effect) IN MY TRUNK!  Since the kids were not with me, and it was a two way street, I decided to push my luck and slow down... yep- way DOWN  (that'll teach em').   I like living on the edge and during this day & age I was playing my own little game of Russian roulette.  As I poked on down the road (in complete control of the situation & unnaturally satisfied with the current outcome), I noticed I had backed up traffic.  Seems a lot of people were out and about enjoying the cool breeze and sunshine.  Then it became growingly apparent that I was the only one that did not have an appointment or a hard core agenda to address... hmmmm.  I mean, I have important stuff to do.  I am a mom.  This house just doesn't stock itself with food.  I also need my therapy... albeit retail therapy... but therapy none the less.. and that is really important and I have limited time to work this in without children.  (sighing)..... Let me ask you this... Have you ever been the victim of a horn attack?  ok- Victim is harsh word... but my house of cards I strategically built to stop the tailgater had turned ugly... it wasn't HIM honking.. it was someone behind HIM.***commentary in my head "What a bunch of Grumps!  Are you honking at me?  Oh NO, you didn't!  If I have to pull this car over and knock you upside the head with my coupon binder, bet you won't be honking that blanking horn again! and so on and so on".***
So in the spirit of giving... I am presenting a gift to ALL of the TAILGATERS and HONKERS out there.. (drumroll- please)
 IT IS A"SIT AND SPIN"....(raspberry inserted here)

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